It was a day off, and I didn’t really do much. I have been playing a game on the computer that Stephen bought me for Christmas. It is a game about world domination. I think that I will be implementing some of the tactics in everyday life soon. Watch out everyone.
Also I did go to the cinema in the afternoon, and watched a very thought provoking film, all about Afghanistan, and the CIA funding for the Afghan fighters against the Russians. Wake up – it was a lot more interesting than it sounds. It was called Charlie Wilson’s War.
Not much more has happened to me today. I’m getting ready for work tomorrow. Ironing shirts, and sorting out manuals, and maps, making some dinners and things isn’t very exciting, is it?
I’m going to put into practice some world domination, and go to take over some plot of sand on the beach.
Wednesday - Sweeney Todd Makes Me Look Thick
After a long lie in this morning, (The Hoff didn't run through the whole collection this morning) I thought what should I do today? I messed around at home for quite a while, drinking coffee (I think the 8 cups a day at training school was a little excessive, but still need something to get of going) and answering emails, it was time to get a move on.On the agenda was nothing exciting, only a haircut. I decided to in into the city, as I'd not been there since day one. Surely enough, after a couple detours, and a few wrong turns I managed to find the right highway (I'm going to learn my way around eventually). It was how I remembered. As you can see, it was still quite busy, with a lot of people all trying to go about their business.
There was a opera singer there singing way to her heart's c
ontent. I've heard some dreadful singing in my time, and this would rank up there with some of them. Battling with her was some Scottish piper, dressed in the whole tartan regalia, droning away as only bag pipes can do. Occasionally when these two were momentarily quite, the distant sound for somebody playing an electric guitar could be heard. It was a dreadful cacophony of sound; and almost put me off sitting outside in an on street cafe, to enjoy the passing world.After an hour or so of watching the world go by, I resolved to get my flowing locks cut (I know my hair most likely aren't described anywhere else as flowing locks) and wondered down the street to some little Chinese Barber Shop, and there I waited until it was my turn.
When I got into Sweeney Todd's chair (It felt like it anyway, as the barber was brandishing a cut throat razor) I was asked how I want my hair cut. I thought he said "If I cut your hair really short, it will make it look thick." So off with it all, I said. Regrettably I think that he actually said "If I cut your hair really short, it will make you look thick!" (Yes, I know it is an old one, but still funny.)
After escaping from the barbers – with a cut throat shave as well – I went home, and did nothing else for the rest of the day. I cannot really make my days off sound any more interesting than they are. Oh, and as well as a lie in in the morning, I did sleep most of the afternoon as well, dreaming of a Pipe Playing, Opera Singing, demon barber of Murray Street, only because there isn't a Fleet Street here with a Barbershop!
Tuesday – What more can I say about a day off.
It is a day off, and much needed. I didn't really do a lot. I went to a bank, and to the shops to look around. At the end of the day, I went to the beach for a swim, and to read my book. I cannot really think that there was much interesting happened, so I'll not bore you with the minutia of my day.
Needless to say, the weather was hot; The Hoff was in good voice this morning, coffee was drunk in abundance, beach and swimming felt great.
I couldn't even find something interesting to take a picture of for you. Maybe I'll think about going to find some Kangaroos and film them.
Monday - Finished my First Night Shift
It isn’t a mystery anymore. I’ve been to work and survived. All those questions that were running around your head like “Do people only call for a genuine reason if they have to pay £250 at least for an ambulance?” and “What is a 14 hour night shift like?” All in good time; I know that I will answer all your questions that are running around in your head and probably other ones as well, that you weren’t even thinking about!I don’t think I’ve mentioned to you the shifts that they work over here. It is the same as the Fire Brigade (Firies remember Aussie Slang for Trumpton/Bucket Heads/Water Fairies) both in England and here work. It is 10 hour days (8 AM until 6 PM) and 14 hour nights (6PM until 8AM). You can see from that, the ambulance service doesn’t count that its nights are particularly busy. If we had done that in Brighton, you would burn out really quickly.
Anyway, at about 4 in the afternoon on Sunday, I’ve realized I haven’t got any clean shirts to wear for work. Luckily it is blazing hot outside, and the wash cycle and drying took all of about 1 hour, and so with the help of an iron and the sunshine, I managed to be presentable for day 1. I did stick all of the other shirts in the wash, and will be ready for my next day at work (which will be Friday Morning).
I didn’t know the score about uniforms, and what we are supposed to wear, so I didn’t wear the shirt on the way to work. That was a stroke of luck, as nobody wears their uniform until they get a call, and then they pop it on, and away they go.
Anyway – it wasn’t long before we (I am working with a decent fellow who has been a paramedic for a while) get our first call, and it was passed as life threatening. The most life threatening thing has got to be me driving with lights and sirens to somewhere I don’t know, with only a little Satellite Navigation System telling me where to go!! We got to the job without much drama, and then off to local hospital.
I won’t really say much about the jobs, only that it doesn’t seem to matter that people are paying, they still want medical attention, and don’t know where to turn to, and use the only avenue they can think of. Our clients (patients, call them what you will) ranged from the very young to the very old and across all socio-economic groups this evening.
The best part of the night was getting all tucked up in a proper bed, and sleeping from 1 in the morning until 6 AM, wh
en we had a low priority transfer between hospitals. Even though I am only new here, I do know from experience in Brighton that these sort of jobs are the ones you want towards the end of the shift, as it doesn’t take much brain power, and keeps you out the system coming up to finish time.Got to base (Yes it does look like any normal house) at just before 8 AM and gladly gave the keys over to the day shift taking over, and went home. Although I’d managed 5 hours sleep through the night, I did have a little rest when I got home. That little rest lasted until about 3 in the afternoon. I did need some sleep.After waking up, you guessed correctly, beach and I did actually venture into the water. The waves were something else, big, and rolling in on top of each other. It was a lot of fun, and very busy (still part of Australia Day Weekend Holiday). I did eventually get home about 10 PM, after meeting up with some friends for a couple social little drinks after we had been on the beach.
Sunday - First Day of Work
I had a lie in this morning. It was very pleasant. No David Hasslehoff, no Chinese Lady Shouting, no ironing to do (actually there is, but I’ll do it later in the day). It is the first day of work, and it’s a night shift. I start at 6 p.m. and work through to 8 a.m. tomorrow morning. Luckily I am at a place known as sleepy hollow. Like I said, it is out on the very edge of the desert.When I did rouse from my bed, and ventured out, it was only a cool 30 degrees outside. Haven’t taken up the national pastime of running in the park yet, so I drove up to where I have been going to church.
After the service, I thought that I’d venture to somewhere I haven’t been to visit yet, (I didn’t go to the moon) I drove to a place called Hilary’s Boat Harbour. After looking at what time the ferry to the little island animal sanctuary leaves, I thought I would have lunch. The only other time I ate in a restaurant was two Sunday’s ago, in Cottesloe, and as that was so enjoyable I thought I would do similar.
People sitting alone in a restaurant always made me laugh, because they always seemed to be fiddling with something, or reading something. I now know why. It is very boring while sitting waiting for food, if there isn’t anyone to talk to. I used the time to start typing up today’s diary entry on my little PDA.
The food today was Salt and Pepper Squid Salad. (It was more battered squid, and not a lot of salad, but still very tasty). Squid salad is getting to be a bit of a habit, as both times I’ve
been to a cafe to eat, I’ve had squid salad. It was very yummy.As soon as I post this online, I’m going to have a little rest before work. I won’t need to worry about an alarm clock, because Sally, my landlady, gets free calls on her mobile phone beginning at 4 in the afternoon, and all this week, without fail, my mobile rings. Guess who.
I’ll let you all know all about the first night at work tomorrow. Keep in touch.
Saturday - Australia Day
Celebrating heritage and being patriotic is something that we don’t really do very well in England. I know that the Scots celebrate Burns Night, and the Welsh have St. David’s Day, and the Irish (everyone helps them out as well) have St. Patricks Day, and technically as English people we can celebrate St. Georges Day, but they aren’t national holidays.The Americans celebrate the day we let them make a hash of it on their own (July 4th) and here in Australia they celebrate the date that Captain Phillip (Captain of the first fleet of Prison Ships) founded the colony of New South Wales (actually he arrived in the Sidney Cove a week earlier than they celebrate it, but no one can come up with a decent reason they have delayed the celebration.)
Anyway that said, today was the 26th and that makes it a public holiday. One of the guys from the course (Pete) had invited everyone around to his house, which he had just rented, and was getting it ready for his family which are coming out in March from the U.K. It was a very new house, and really quite
nice.As there were a few South African people of the course, I thought it would be nice to make them feel at home, and went to a South African Deli nearby my house. I bought a couple of things, of which the highlight would be Curried Chillies. They did go down a treat.
Anyway other new housemate arrived in the early afternoon. (I didn’t hear if we had an encore concert from David Hasslehoff this morning, although Hagen wasn’t home when I got up). He was just unloading his truck, before going to the Australia Day celebrations near the city. Now we have a full house, and the other two work 6 days a week, so I feel like I’ve still got a house to myself.
Deon and Madelyn gave me a lift to Pete’s house, where the BBQ was hot, and there where loads of cold drinks. We munched are way through loads of food, washed down with a lot of drinks, and had a lot of laughing and joking. It was be strange not seeing everyone every day, as we have been evenly divided around 4 different shifts, in a lot of different shifts.
When I got home, I watched coverage of the fireworks from the foreshore downtown. The facts are just staggering. Western Australia is the size of Western Europe, but with a population of about 2 million people. The news reports were saying that at least 500,000 people were watching the fireworks from the foreshore of the Swan River, and the surrounding parks. It is hard to picture a ¼ of the population of Europe all a couple small parks.
We do need to celebrate Australia Day and 4th of July in England, as the days when we made the world a better place (Dropping off of a load of convicts on an island half way around the world, and letting the Americans become the sole owners of the “Most Hated Nation” in the world status.) I wonder what the Aussies will do when I hoist my Cross of St. George on St. George’s Day
Friday – Everyone was Kung Fo Fighting
It was the last day of the course today, and was planned for more law and how to protect yourself from violent and unpredictable people. Also we were going to practice some skills to get us out of trouble if some wild and crazy Aussie takes a dislike to me. I know it's hard to imagine how that would be possible, what with me so easy-going and lovable.
I had to get a lift to work this morning because my car was left near training school yesterday. It is handy a couple others are living near me, and were able to give me a ride.
The alarm wasn't necessary because my new housemate thinks he is the Hoff and was belting out the hits while in the shower at 6 in the morning. (The Hoff and not Tom Jones because he is a German Medallion Man called Hagen.) At least once work is in full swing I'll not be around at 6 in the morning (unless I'm on a day off-maybe I'll mention I'm not a big fan and can he turn the volume down to where he is only performing to an intimate Wembley Arena crowd, and not on stage at Wembley Stadium.)
Once more Friday lessons went longer than any other day this week. There is something wrong with that picture. Also as you can imagine the actual law isn't the most gripping topic with legal definitions. Then came more interesting subjects - who I can hit and how hard. (Actually I can hit anyone if I have a reason and as hard as "I deem is reasonable." - so very hard then.)
Then we learned some moves to get away from an attacker and how to disarm his if we can't get away. It was very fun.
That evening I went to Jamie and Julies for dinner. We (Jamie and I) tried to call some of our friends in the UK, but no one was in, so we sent some abuse to them via SMS Text messages. We thought it was funny.
So the training course is now finished, and I am going to be let loose on the poor unsuspecting public of Western Australia on Sunday Night. The shifts are 10 hour days and 14 hour nights in a rolling day, day, night, night, 4 days off shift pattern. I'm into the last of the nights, so one night at work, and then 4 days off. That is excellent. We were given our postings and I have been posted on the outskirts of Perth in the east, right on the edge of the desert. I hope there aren't to many crazy Aussies out there, but most likely there are with the sun scrambling their brains.
Thursday – Ambulances don’t break down do they??
How I was looking forward to today. It was going to be a driving course, but with a difference. It promised to be a very relaxed day, driving around Perth, looking at sights, and visiting various locations. There wasn't going to be any pressure. How great is it going to be and then we had arranged a little end of the course get together in the early evening.
Off I went to the Training school, to pick an ambulance up, and take it to the company that were doing our driver training. The instructor and I had a little disagreement about what we were expected to do if we came across an accident while out and about (highly like I think). For the record – I thought we should stop and render assistance, and he said we wouldn't because we were there to learn about driving.
That didn't really get me started in the right mood, but I tried to release the tension, and throughout the day it was never mentioned again. We did come across an accident, and as I was driving, we did stop. That was the end of that. (Me Right/Other People Wrong Again – Why does it always seem to be that way)
Anyway, after we stopped at one of the hospitals – Royal Perth Hospital, which is the main hospital in the city and is one of the main Accident and Emergency Department. It was to see where we needed to
drop people off who have had the misfortune of riding in my Ambulance."Let's go get lunch!" was the request from the instructor. Rudi – his turn to drive – go in, and tried to start the ambulance. I have seen more life in a fossil than in the ambulance. We tried everything (yes, including looking in the manual – I learned my lesson about that a couple of weeks ago), but nothing.
Rudi looked at the engine. I asked him if he knew what was wrong, and he said "I know as much about an engine, as you know about being a paramedic" (as you can tell, we have built up a good rapport). Eventually the RAC came out and gave us a jumpstart, and we took the ambulance to the workshops so that they could look at it.
To make a short story very short, our ambulance was proper broken, and we had to swap it for another, but there wasn't one available for a while. (More waiting around, but you didn't hear us complain.) By the time we got the replacement, guess what...
Yes, it was home time. Can't complain about not seeing much, and really didn't have my heart in it anyway after the little difference of opinion first thing in the morning.
I went off to the beach after having a little get together in a local restaurant and sat and watched the sun set, and did really miss home for the first time for a week or so. It does get easier, but not much. Another day that started with so much promise, didn't end on such an upbeat note. Tomorrow will be better, because it is the last day of the course.
Wednesday – Exam Day
Have you ever noticed that it doesn't matter how you say it, or how you phrase it, people still get nervous about exams. Although you might not think so, I get a little anxious about them as well. Never before, but since a near miss with not being about to attain the preferred scorein my paramedic exams, I do feel more anxious than before.
(By the way, that phrase was politically correct speak used in some of my previous jobs – Not in evidence here in Western Australia) Over here if you don't get enough points – you've FAILED – and there is no two ways about it. That the way that I prefer it.
It was hard to get up this morning, after a long night of not much sleep. I'm managed to get used to all the hot weather all the time, except for when I am trying to sleep. I can see why people who can only afford one air conditioner have it in their bedroom.
Anyway, off I went to training school – my shirt was ironed from a few days ago, and that made the morning's ablutions a lot quicker, and I was out the house by about 7. (I am going to have to get up later in future). Just the same as the South Coast Road, there was no traffic on the highway, until about 0730 when everyone goes to work, and the motorway comes to a standstill.
I can't really say much about the exam (Thank goodness – I hear you say) except when I finished, I was glad that I had studied more than what was suggested during class. As usual, no results back by the end of the day. Oh well, the pass mark for the paper was only 65%, and I think spelling your name correctly was worth 50% (On joking, but there were a lot of giveaway points available).
After the exam there was another set of practical tests again. They don't pose my any problems, as I've had chance to sharpen my skills up to where they should be. I think that might be the reason for so many practical assessments.
For the record lots of breaks as well (As is come to be expected), and because the class was so small, we were done about 2 in the afternoon. Great!
One of the instructors invited a couple of us round to his house in the evening. Not many people there, but we used his pool, and had a good old laugh and a joke. It was great to let the nervous tension of the exam day go. He did give me the nod and the wink that my marks for my paper were pretty good. All that worry for nothing.
Tuesday – What to do with a half day off?
Boy, was I excited about a half a day off today. In reality it was more like two hours off, as the others who had to stay did only stay at work till about 3, as it was another scorcher.It might as well have been a whole day off with what the course/driving instructor was talking about. Who can remember their stopping distances? I struggled to learn them in Miles an hour, and yards and feet – I haven't got a clue in kilometres and hour, and metres. Is 150 metres a long way to stop in?? Who knows?
We did learn other useful facts about Australian laws. Most are quite sensible, but one was very odd. For the purposes of law, an ambulance is only an emergency vehicle, and able to break the relevant traffic laws when it is moving. Practically if you think about that, if you have to stop at traffic lights with lights and sirens going, then you are not allowed to proceed forward through a red light. It is crazy.
When we stopped for lunch, I left the driving school, and rushed off home via a coffee shop. It was 35 to 36 degrees, so it was iced coffee for me. (I had to have a coffee as we hadn't had the requisite 4 breaks this morning.)
As I had the afternoon to myself, I had a quick shower in factor 30 sun lotion, because of the afternoon's plans. I was anticipating going down the beach for a while. I was planning to be there for a couple of hours.
Silly me, after 30 minutes I was nicely cooked, and did finally brave the sea for a cooling dip. So not bad really, almost 3 weeks before getting into the Indian Ocean, and no I wasn't harpooned, or eaten by a shark.
On the way home, I stopped for a couple of photos by the seaside, and then in true tourist fashion, fish and chips (only the second time since leaving England). My ½ day off seemed so relaxing that I didn't think it was possible to be ruined.
How wrong was I? A list of people to show around the house was sent to me by Sally, and then it didn't look like anyone had done any cleaning around the kitchen, or mopped the floors, since I did them last week, so I had to do a quick hoover up and mop the floors, and put away the pots and pans from Jack's cooking the night before. I know you might think that I am a slob, but I cannot live in a pigsty.
I did escape with a work colleague to the Saint George Hotel behind the house at about 2130 for last orders (pub closed at 2200 tonight.)
At least I was very relaxed to do the last little bit of study for the big exam tomorrow!!! It doesn't take long for a half day off work to fly by.
Monday – How to be de-motivated in one easy step
Morning came around with its usual regularity. As Sunday was a quiet, relaxing day I was feeling all energised, and raring to go this week. It's only one more week, before I get to be let loose onto the unsuspecting Australian public.
On the way to work (No hair-raising near misses today – I told you things were good) I did actually treat myself to Muzz Buzz. (Drive thru coffee has got to be a money making opportunity in the U.K.) I have had to cut back on the amount of coffee I buy, because of all the free coffee breaks during class.
I hadn't checked the daily schedule to see what we were up to day, so I hadn't got a clue what we were about to walk into. First thing was to get the driving course for Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday organised.
It went along the lines of "We need two groups, one of 9 and the other of 5. Then you'll all need to meet in Malaga (not Spain and it is said like Me-lager) at the driving school. (Simple so far) But not all of you can go straight to the driving school, because three people need to meet at Training School to bring some Ambulances. (Are you keeping up) Then the group of 5 will go home early on Tuesday, and then come to Training School on Wednesday, and Driving School on Thursday and the group of 9 will stay all day on Tuesday, and all day Wednesday at Driving School, and then Training School on Thursday. (Confused yet?)" There were a few more instructions, and then a lot of questions before lots were drawn for who was in which group. I ended up in the group of 5, so I'll be looking forward to a ½ day Tuesday.
I can here you ask "Why not make the two groups 7 each?" That is a very good question, and if I do find the answer, I'll let you know.
I'm sure that I don't need to tell you what came next....You guessed it coffee time (This was only a short break, as the PowerPoint projector had packed up, and we were waiting for I.T. Department to pop in with a replacement.) When we re-entered the classroom, we were greeted with the sight of some very important people. (I could tell they were important because 1 – they were wearing ties (it's far too hot for that sort of clothing), and 2 – their picture is in the front of our manuals) It was the chief of the Ambulance Service – with a presentation for us, and a welcome talk by his number two man.
The presentation involved a lot of business jargon all about bottom line, cost effectiveness, staff motivation, business plans, projected earnings (St. John's Ambulance is a private business here, so we have customers, not patients). I didn't catch the vision, so to speak.
The rest of the morning was taken up with presentations, and seminars on all manner of business matters. Not my bag, but I'm sure it was interesting to people who enjoy that sort of 
thing. Lunch time – hooray – then practical sessions on loading and unloading ambulances, and using some equipment that won't be used much. There were a few coffee breaks (3) and a lot of hanging around, until 3 p.m. when we all made excuses and left.
On the way home, I saw a fish mongers, 
and out of curiosity I went in to have a look around. The different types of seafood were staggering, and all very cheap. I'll be taking prawns (or are the crayfish, who knows) to the next BBQ (I think planned for Wednesday night).
As I did some study late into the evening, I did think about all the customer care, charging for ambulances, etc, and realised that people still get sick the same way, and their body still works the same way, whether the treatment is free or not. Not very motivated by the Chief though.
Sunday – Bring and Braii
The start of week 4 (or is it three – who is counting at this stage, besides Jane and me). My computer at home is working like a treat, and now with the internet access I have it is great. I think that I'm going to have to be careful about the amount that I am using it, or I will go over my limit that I am allowed. I've used a quarter of it all ready and I've only had it for a couple days, but I won't need to download loads of programs/updates for Windows anymore.
While I was wasting time at home, before the afternoons activities were to begin, Jack (Jeff?? Which is it) came in and told me he was moving out. I guess that is why he didn't pay his rent yesterday. That must have been what Sally was trying to tell me conspiratorially yesterday, but being thick I didn't understand it.
My computer has been playing up, and as usual for a Microsoft Machine the only way that I could sort it out was to complete re-install the Windows system and that is what has messed me up.
Sunday there was a BBQ planned on the beach with work colleagues again. I know – it is a hardship – but some people need to do it. Who else is going to keep the Australian farming economy alive?
Today wasn't really jam packed full of fun; however, it is a day of rest. I am getting recognised in church, which is a good thing. I didn't take up the landlady Sally's offer of lunch though. I didn't want to be the youngest by a long way at a table full of Chinese Malaysians. I'm sure that the restaurant was going to be great, but I didn't want to risk it. Besides, I had some steak, and some snags (easy one that one – sausages) to cook, and some generally high jinks to be had, and didn't want to get to full beforehand.
While I was wasting time at home, before the afternoons activities were to begin, Jack (Jeff?? Which is it) came in and told me he was moving out. I guess that is why he didn't pay his rent yesterday. That must have been what Sally was trying to tell me conspiratorially yesterday, but being thick I didn't understand it.Off I trotted to the beach for about 3, to meet up with Madelyn, Rudi, Deon (Madelyn's husband) and a few others from the training course. After some joking and a short game of beach cricket (South Africans are almost as competitive as Aussie's) someone mentioned a swim. (Oops – I'd forgotten my tiger print Speedos again, so I was never going to go in the water). In they all dived, and played in the waves, jumping through them, and trying to swim in to shore with them.
In the middle of this hilarious adult behaviour (I know what you are thinking – it sounds like a bunch of children) a helicopter came swooping over low along the beach, and a loud air raid (I think that is what they sound like) siren went off all along the beach front. Aussie all ran out of the water and started looking towards where the helicopter was circling (about 1-2 miles north of where we were). I am reliably informed that it was the SHARK warning siren, because someone had spotted a shark in the water.
Oh my goodness – first it was the Japanese Whaling ships that kept me out the water – and now there are sharks (I wonder if I wore my tiger print Speedos, whether anyone would think I was a Tiger Shark??? – strange what goes through your head)!! I don't think I am destined to swim.
Anyway – BBQ (Braii in Afrikaans) and then more cricket. 
What a great way to spend the afternoon. One of our instructors arrived along the beach also, with his two little girls, and a couple of other ambulance guys who have been knocking around training school for the last couple weeks. Also Eddie (Chester Ambulance Station), Kathryn (Solihull Ambulance Station), Claire and Paul (Trafford Ambulance Station), Pete (Oxford Ambulance Station – I think), and Earl (he brought his squeeze – Afrikaans term of endearment for his wife – been working in Zambia) came along – so as you can see, it was a good turnout.
I popped home after to get ready for work. Someone had mentioned that if I ironed all my shirts in one go, I would have more time in the morning. That was the plan, but got messing around on the computer, and all that went out the window. Maybe I'll take care of the ironing tomorrow night, but for right now I am going to shout about Bill Gates!!!!! Why are your files so big???
Saturday – Watch out for the Landlady
What a rude awakening (although it was 1030 in the morning) by my very boisterous landlady who had arrived. "Jack, Jack" she was shouting. I had to rise from my very comfortable pit to find out what is occurring. Sally (my landlady) is quite eccentric, and I couldn't help but get included into her shouting and bustling around the house like a Tasmanian Devil.I don't know if I mentioned it, but she is a Malaysian lady from Penang, who has moved down here, and is a school teacher.
It transpired that Jack hadn't paid his rent yesterday, but had already gone out this morning. Then it was "David, I've brought you some bread." (She does bring bread round two or three times a week), then "David, do you want a cup of coffee?" then "David you washing is finished," then "David, can you wait in to show someone around the house later?"
Not too bad you think, but all this was done while I was in my room, trying to tidy up, and take care of Saturday chores, and she was in the kitchen/back yard/front garden. She's gone now, which if like a mini tornado leaving. She did drop off some pull outs from the newspaper, which are advertising the prices in the local shops. "Look David, Eggs Very Cheap Yes?" "Here David, You should go and get some Tissues, they are on special yes", and the like. I don't think I'll be buying any of the stuff she is pointing out.
I'm going to go to IKEA in a little while this afternoon, to look at some cheap plates, and glasses, because although there are some here, they are really not nice. I do have some standards you know!
Anyway, I've included a picture of me on my front patio area of the house, on the blog http://davedangerous1971.blogspot.com/ which as you can see isn't very big, but fine to relax on, listening to music, or reading books on cricket/first aid/Perth – they are the only three books I've got at the moment, besides a city map book. (People refer to it with three letters, but then lots of things are three letters over here.
IGA – equivalent to Tesco's Express (convenience stores that are everywhere and the only shops open on Sunday)
BBQ- Somewhere to cook dinner - South Africans call it a Braai in Africaans
UBD – Local Map (don't ask me why), I call it the MAP.
Note to self – If you want a lie in on Saturday Morning, make sure you have paid your rent for the fortnight. Mine is due next Saturday. I think I'll put it into an envelope today.
Friday – What a relief
I have a habit of calling things the wrong names. I've been calling my house mate "Jeff" all the time, and was wondering why he didn't answer sometimes. He is a Chinese fellow, and I thought that maybe it was because he couldn't speak very good England. I find out now, it is because his name is "Jack". Oh well, we live and learn.
I work up this morning to look out at the sky to find that there were grey overcast skies. "Am I back in England and dreaming?" I asked myself, but no, that wasn't the case. It wasn't driving rain, and freezing cold, just a gently (I have been here to long) 25 degrees. Will I need my jacket to take to work, I wondered.
Each day is an adventure, out on the motorway (freeway over here. Very Colonial – the other ex-colonies I've been to also call their motorways freeways). There are supposed to be a lot of English people here, but they all seem to have left their driving skills (if they ever had any) somewhere before coming over.
There are three and sometimes four lanes of traffic, which you can pass on either side. In my mind that would make everyone drive at roughly the same speed, but oh no, it is just accident heaven. If you know someone who likes to remove dents and repair accident damage from cars, I'm sure they would make a fortune of cash over here, fixing smashed up cars.
I saw two accidents on the way to work this morning. The nice thing about it is I haven't got anything in my car to be able to help them, so I just carried on chugging along. And then it looked like it was going to be my turn. I needed to overtake a bus, to get to the slip road at my junction for training school, but as I was trying to pass it, a car pulled out from in front of the bus and then slowed down. ARRGGGHHHH, it was a close call, and needless to say, I missed the junction, and the offending car, lost my temper and then got lost in a suburb I'd never been to.
Training went with a breeze. The exam turned out to be a quiz, in the University Challenge style. After that we were inducted into the Union. (It is almost closed shop working here, and we weren't really left with much of a choice about joining or not.)
After lunch (a short one ½ hour) it was more practical assessments, on Advanced Life Support. I don't think I did too badly, and then home early.
Driving home was almost as much fun as driving to work. Only one near miss and that was at the roundabout at the end of my road. I think that indicators are optional extras here, that most people don't bother purchasing, when they buy a car. That is what it certainly feels like.
Friday night I went out into Freemantle to a pub/restaurant right on the harbour front, with Dave, and Katherine (two paramedics from Hove who moved out here earlier last year). The food was scrummy (nice to have eat something other than steak – I know what a hardship), and the drink was all brewed on the premises. I want to call the place "Creature Comforts", but I think looking in the Perth guidebook this morning it's called "Little Creatures".
I hope that I'll get a little better with names soon.
Thursday – Another scorcher
They (the locals here) tell me that it doesn't get much warmer than this. I hope not, because if it does, I'll need some basting, and tenderising. It was 41 this afternoon about 3.
I fell asleep in front of the T.V. last night, watching some rubbish Australian soap opera. After I eventually crawled back to my room and did wake up at the correct time, I felt like someone had left me to sleep in the tumble dryer. I didn't feel like I had much sleep, and really wasn't up for work today.
The day ahead was not really full of inspiring topics, so it definitely had to be a double espresso from Muzz Buzz, and some last minute revising for the quiz I was expecting today.
To my surprise/relief the planned lectures/quiz had been postponed. Great – another day like yesterday – but I was mistaken. The first session was the most important person in St. John's Ambulance service – the lady who does our rosters. I found out about after training school, I'm into what is known as Blue Shift, which means that I'm into a string of days off. That is a touch.
After that, it was into Infection Control. That is definitely a subject you don't want to have after a rough night of sleep. It feels like a subject that is being taught, to tick a box, that we have been told how to wash our hands, and then who to see if we have a sharps injury. All very valid subjects, but not today, and taught by a man who seemed like he had as much personality as a flip flop.
He did then show us some safety videos about....wait for it....the safety precautions to take if we are called to an accident on a Hydrogen powered bus (turn off the power at a switch near the door), and then more safety precautions to take if we were firemen (firies) trying to cut a Toyota Prius (Hybrid Powered Car) roof off. Not exactly need to know information.
At least the usual amounts of coffee breaks were had. Just before lunch, a very important talk about applying to the government for permanent residence. I'll be able to start the process in about 2 months time, not the 2 years I was told in the interview.
After lunch manual handling practice, with Mel the Physiotherapist again, this wasn't too bad. Some of the group got into trouble for knocking plaster out of one of the wall. (Ha ha ha ha – I can laugh, as it wasn't me)
Home time came around about 3, and then it was back to the house to take care of some requests by Sally – my landlady to give the house an extra spit and polish, as there were some people going to look at the last room that is available.
Called home, and then BBQ on the beach with Rudi, Madelyn and Deon, before retiring to learn the drugs I am allowed to administer.
I only mentioned the heat, because getting into my car after work, I couldn't even hardly hold the steering wheel, as it was to warm. I'm going to have to get a sun shade for my windscreen before too long.
It's finally dropped in temperature to about 25 now at 10 p.m., so it doesn't look like it will be a night of vey restful sleep again tonight. I hope I'm wrong.
Wednesday – Ambulance Training can be Hard Work – But ours isn’t
I could tell you all about the lack of breaks today, or the temperature extremes today, but I'm sure that you all are sick of hearing about it. Yes, not one coffee breaks the whole day. Who would have thought it, and to think that I was complaining about the total number of breaks yesterday. 
In reality though, today consisted of larking around in a park for most of the day, with a couple simulated emergency calls interrupting our fun.
The group split into groups, and we borrowed a few ambulances and went enroute to a nearby park area. This park wasn't wild bush land, but a nicely manicured grassy area with trees dotted around and it was right on the Swan River. We all tried our hand at throwing an Aussie Rules football around (It is pumped up so much it is like rock – no wonder the guys who play are so bad tempered). We did do some simulated emergency calls – as I say. It is a far cry from a manikin with a large spider on his chest.
The group split into groups, and we borrowed a few ambulances and went enroute to a nearby park area. This park wasn't wild bush land, but a nicely manicured grassy area with trees dotted around and it was right on the Swan River. We all tried our hand at throwing an Aussie Rules football around (It is pumped up so much it is like rock – no wonder the guys who play are so bad tempered). We did do some simulated emergency calls – as I say. It is a far cry from a manikin with a large spider on his chest.When I was doing my paramedic training in Sussex, we did get promise
d some fun sessions, but that usually entailed not having to fill in another quiz about drugs, or only one run through of the Advanced Life Support instead of three. None of that was as fun as playing football in a park, stopping at lunch for a BBQ – laid on by the instructors – of steaks, foot long sausages (both chicken and beef varieties), all washed down with very cold pop. There was a load of food, which we couldn't finish.
d some fun sessions, but that usually entailed not having to fill in another quiz about drugs, or only one run through of the Advanced Life Support instead of three. None of that was as fun as playing football in a park, stopping at lunch for a BBQ – laid on by the instructors – of steaks, foot long sausages (both chicken and beef varieties), all washed down with very cold pop. There was a load of food, which we couldn't finish.Because of the great big load up, and the ambient temperature of 39, the instructors said there wasn't going to be anymore exercises, and we should go up to King's Park (higher elevation, lower temperature, and more shade trees). We piled in the ambulances, and drove up there, 
admired the views, laughed and joked, had some ice cream, walked slowly under the shade trees, more views, more joking and laughing, and then we were told "It's about 2 o'clock, let's go back to base, wash the ambulances, and clear off home"
admired the views, laughed and joked, had some ice cream, walked slowly under the shade trees, more views, more joking and laughing, and then we were told "It's about 2 o'clock, let's go back to base, wash the ambulances, and clear off home" You don't need to tell a bunch of ambo's more than once to go home.
After school – if you can call it that – I had a load of errands to run, and then I chatted to Jane over the video SKYPE for about 1 hour 30 minutes. What marvellous idea that is.
I can't keep procrastinating the study any more. Maybe the quiz on Friday will go the way of today's afternoon session. I do hope so!!!!
After school – if you can call it that – I had a load of errands to run, and then I chatted to Jane over the video SKYPE for about 1 hour 30 minutes. What marvellous idea that is.
I can't keep procrastinating the study any more. Maybe the quiz on Friday will go the way of today's afternoon session. I do hope so!!!!
Australian Medical Terms I’ve Learned
It hasn't all been messing around. I have been studying as well. I thought it would be good to post a list of new medical terms I've come across in the first couple of weeks of me being here.
Benign........................................What you will be after you be eight
Bacteria......................................Back door to the cafeteria
Barium........................................What you do when they are dead
Caesarean Section.......................A neighbourhood in Rome
Cauterize....................................Made Eye contact with her
Colic.............................................A sheep dog
Coma...........................................Punctuation Mark
Dilate...........................................To live Long
Enema.........................................Not a friend
Fester..........................................Quicker that someone else
Fibula...........................................A small lie
Hangnail.......................................A place to hang your hat
Impotent.....................................Distinguished person, well known
Medical Staff................................A doctor's walking stick
Morbid.........................................Someone else's winning bid on eBay
Nitrates........................................Cheaper than Day Rates
Outpatient...................................Someone who has fainted
Post Operative.............................A letter carrier
Rectum........................................Near killed 'um
Seizure........................................A Roman Emperor
Terminal Illness............................Getting sick at the airport
Tumour........................................More than one, but less than three
Urine............................................Opposite of mine
Varicose.......................................Nearby
Tuesday – Why don’t roads melt?
Today dawned with the usual clear skies, and promise of good weather. That is going to make a change from clear blue skies, a light breeze in the afternoon, and under pant melting temperatures if you get caught out in the sun for more than 5 seconds in the middle of the day. (It has been a little warmer over the last couple of afternoons – my underpants all have melted).
One interesting phenomenon I have noticed with the toe curling heat of the midday sun (yes, it is only mad dogs and English men who are out in it – not even the spiders, deadly of course, and snakes, equally as deadly, make an appearance between sort of noon and three in the afternoon) is that the roads don't melt – not that interesting I guess, just something to think about this evening over a cup of warm milk. J
Today held the promise of more hard graft – I know you don't want to hear about the breaks any more, although I did count today – 4 coffee breaks, 2 take a walk outside breaks during lectures, 1 lunch break, and most of the afternoon we sat around outside generally chin wagging. The general chin wagging was because it was assessment day, and they do take a long time.
My assessment went something along the lines of "You've been called to a man collapsed in the park. People are gathered around him, but don't know what is wrong. You are the only ambulance around the area (so don't expect to get any help, even if you want it – about the most realistic part of the scenario). "
You will see, if you look at the blog picture, what I was presented with – a resuscitation dummy with a great big spider on his chest. (No wonder people are scared of them if they are that big. No cuddly Charlotte's Web sized spider here). Anyway, I did manage to pass without much trouble. (The manikin – as it transpired – didn't survive the fall from the very large tree he was climbing when he was bitten by the said furry spider to which he was very allergic to – fall from height, and anaphylaxis "Unlucky" is all I can say; and to top it all off, he had me treating him!)
The assessments (all take a long time) were in the afternoon, which is why we sat around joking and laughing.
As home time loomed (3 p.m.) I received a phone call. My things had arrived from the U.K. I now have more under pants that I can melt in the midday sun, along with photographs, books, DVD's, more clothes, and other essentials (my entire life really) was in the two boxes, lovingly packed by Jane at home.
So for this evenings contemplating – spider bites, melting under pants, and non melting roads. I am definitely going to have to get to the pub early.
Monday - Read the instructions
MondayWhen the alarm went off (I have invested in a new alarm clock – without Timmy Mallet singing to me) it was a shock. I had been out for a usual Sunday afternoon for me (I guess it doesn’t matter what country I am in) consisting of football, and a couple of small glasses of beer. I’m going to have to start calling it soccer over here, as football means a game of legalised fighting that we know as Aussie Rules.
Anyway back to this morning, I did feel every one of my 36 years. Fortunately shirt was ironed, so it was into the Purple Peril, and off to work.
Today involved – yes you guessed it coffee time x 4 or 5, as well as an hour lunch break. I had managed to make my own sandwiches today. The picture is of us hardworking Paramedics at lunch break (We are the same the world over) My landlady Sally brings bread rolls home every day from the bakery next door to her shop (they are all out of date, so almost stale) and I had some steak left over from the BBQ of Saturday, so more steak sandwiches made up last night – yummy.
Interspersed between the coffee breaks was a Pre-Hospital Trauma Life Support course. It is actually as interesting as it sounds (unusually for the ambulance service). We all knew the stuff, but it is a great refresher. After lunch was practical assessments (I passed mine, in case you are wondering) of the morning’s learning. Normally this course is 3-4 days, with lots of practical practice, but the instructors recognise our skills, and knowledge.
After school I had to go shopping for some essentials. I had come up with a cunning plan to cook once or twice a week, and then live on leftovers the rest of the week. Today it was going to ingredients for a chilli, a beef curry, and then maybe tuna pasta bake, or macaroni cheese. (As you can see, I’ve not lost the urge to be Gordon Ramsay. I put the ingredients for my Malaysian curry (actually beef rending) into the basket. There was loads of Coconut milk on the shelf (far cry from Sainsbury’s, which has one brand if we are lucky). I didn’t look at all the tins, and picked one up that was the cheapest. Now I’m cooking my curry, I realise I have picked up Coconut Milk soup. It tastes alright, so with some other bits and bobs, it’s very tasty.
It actually smells like a Chinese Take Away, because my housemate (who is Chinese) is cooking prawn soup with Chinese vegetables as well.
And yes, just in case you thought that I missed out, I did sit by the sea for about 1 hour this evening doing some studying.
Sunday - A day of Rest and Robbing Broadband Bandwidth
Sunday
I’ve got to find somewhere (internet cafe, etc.) to be able to log in to the computer. That was my goal for the day, so after church I drove down to the city to look for somewhere to log in to the computer, and send my emails.
That was initially a great plan. It would have been successful if I hadn’t got distracted. I stopped in King’s Park (a very big park in Perth) and fell asleep under a tree for an hour or so. Thank goodness I had had a shower in sun lotion earlier. It is about 29-30 degrees according to the radio.
Once on the move again, I found a small coffee shop, with wireless access to the internet (not from the shop, is it stealing broadband if the owners don’t know?)
That is where I am now, with a large chilli squid salad, and some freshly squeezed juice, getting ready to email this to various people.
My room is now feeling a little like home now!! I've put up the picture of Daisy, Jane and Analiese, and set up my computer, although I keep taking my computer out to various internet cafes now. It doesn't look much, but it is alright!!!!
I’ve got to find somewhere (internet cafe, etc.) to be able to log in to the computer. That was my goal for the day, so after church I drove down to the city to look for somewhere to log in to the computer, and send my emails.
That was initially a great plan. It would have been successful if I hadn’t got distracted. I stopped in King’s Park (a very big park in Perth) and fell asleep under a tree for an hour or so. Thank goodness I had had a shower in sun lotion earlier. It is about 29-30 degrees according to the radio.
Once on the move again, I found a small coffee shop, with wireless access to the internet (not from the shop, is it stealing broadband if the owners don’t know?)
That is where I am now, with a large chilli squid salad, and some freshly squeezed juice, getting ready to email this to various people.
My room is now feeling a little like home now!! I've put up the picture of Daisy, Jane and Analiese, and set up my computer, although I keep taking my computer out to various internet cafes now. It doesn't look much, but it is alright!!!!
Saturday - Moving and BBQ's
Saturday
I had a lie in, which was very nice, and at least I didn’t have to trust the mobile phone for a wakeup call again. Another nervous day lay ahead. It was time for the big move to the room away from Alan and Emma’s house. I had a great time finding my feet with their house to call a base for a while. Now it was out into the great big city on my own. I wasn’t to worried, as I am big enough and ugly enough to look after myself.
Before the move, I had to take the trusty hire car back to the depot. I’d arrange to drop it off in Perth Centre, as I wasn’t sure how to get back from the airport, using public transport. Finding the place was really easy, as my all knowing SatNav directed me to the door straight away. Forgot to fuel up the car in the excitement of the big city.
It was one of those times that you have driven by tons of petrol stations, but when it comes to needing one, is there any around. Eventually I found one, and then back to the Hertz Offices. When I stopped in the first time there was no one in, but I guess that about 2000 people had ordered their cars for 10:00 AM, which is what time I was supposed to drop mine off. Every single one of them had a problem, or query, or complaint as well. The young lady behind the counter couldn’t have been more courteous (Not Typically Australian – I think she was from Liverpool), but people just kept on being rude.
I was happy to be out of there, and then caught the train back up to where I was at Alan’s house, packed my car, said cheerio, and left to live in
my new place.
Lovely room, but I did have to purchase a couple essentials, (like sheets, duvet, pillows, a towel, alarm clock – hooray – and some laundry baskets) The check out girl was very astute, and said “I see you must have just moved in on your own..” – Clever lot these Aussies.
I whiled the rest of the day was on the beach (I am even closer here than before), watching some Friendly/State/National/International Beach Volleyball (I wasn’t really paying much attention). While there I ran into a couple from South Africa who are on my course. We thought it would be fun to use one of the public barbeques, and have a little late afternoon snack. That consisted of Lamb Chops, Steak, and Sausages, with a couple rolls, salad, and washed down with some local beer.
The picture is of Deon - a South African Paramedic (in the black shirt) and some other guy (who we don't know) using the BBQ on the grass just by Scarborough Beach.
I had a lie in, which was very nice, and at least I didn’t have to trust the mobile phone for a wakeup call again. Another nervous day lay ahead. It was time for the big move to the room away from Alan and Emma’s house. I had a great time finding my feet with their house to call a base for a while. Now it was out into the great big city on my own. I wasn’t to worried, as I am big enough and ugly enough to look after myself.
Before the move, I had to take the trusty hire car back to the depot. I’d arrange to drop it off in Perth Centre, as I wasn’t sure how to get back from the airport, using public transport. Finding the place was really easy, as my all knowing SatNav directed me to the door straight away. Forgot to fuel up the car in the excitement of the big city.
It was one of those times that you have driven by tons of petrol stations, but when it comes to needing one, is there any around. Eventually I found one, and then back to the Hertz Offices. When I stopped in the first time there was no one in, but I guess that about 2000 people had ordered their cars for 10:00 AM, which is what time I was supposed to drop mine off. Every single one of them had a problem, or query, or complaint as well. The young lady behind the counter couldn’t have been more courteous (Not Typically Australian – I think she was from Liverpool), but people just kept on being rude.
I was happy to be out of there, and then caught the train back up to where I was at Alan’s house, packed my car, said cheerio, and left to live in
my new place.Lovely room, but I did have to purchase a couple essentials, (like sheets, duvet, pillows, a towel, alarm clock – hooray – and some laundry baskets) The check out girl was very astute, and said “I see you must have just moved in on your own..” – Clever lot these Aussies.
I whiled the rest of the day was on the beach (I am even closer here than before), watching some Friendly/State/National/International Beach Volleyball (I wasn’t really paying much attention). While there I ran into a couple from South Africa who are on my course. We thought it would be fun to use one of the public barbeques, and have a little late afternoon snack. That consisted of Lamb Chops, Steak, and Sausages, with a couple rolls, salad, and washed down with some local beer.
The picture is of Deon - a South African Paramedic (in the black shirt) and some other guy (who we don't know) using the BBQ on the grass just by Scarborough Beach.
Friday - As dull as a Barrel of Smashed Crabs, with the best one's taken out
Friday
I am going to have to invest in an alarm clock. I didn’t manage to wake up until 7, and that was only when Jane rang me to say Good Morning/Goodnight. Oh well, we live and learn.
No time for any coffee on the way to work. We’ll be getting loads anyway through the day (So I thought). Bleary eyed I walked in, by the skin of my teeth. I hope that they don’t think that I’m going to make a habit of this.
The first session was filling in various forms needed for work. The session was taken straight from the course for the very new intake’s, who have never filled in Ambulance paperwork before. In my half asleep state I remember being pointed out the box for ‘Date’ and the Power Point Presentation instruction us to write in the box “Today’s Date”... and so it progressed. As you imagine, no breakfast, nothing to drink, I was very happily taking this in my stride (I don’t think).
Anyway – “Have a stretch – but don’t be long” Oh now... The only day I was hoping for it there wasn’t a coffee break 45 minutes into the first session. Anyway – we pressed on with more presentations. Major Incident Management Systems (MIMS) is an important subject I am sure (actually I do understand the reasons behind the instruction, being in a couple Major Incidents in Sussex), but it is about as interesting as a barrel of smashed crabs, with the best bits taken out. (New Aussie saying I’ve picked up). Boy did it drag.
Interspersed in the day was also a session on radios (not the music ones), and the set up of the Ambo (more Aussie Slang – ambulance – maybe I’ll include some of the Aussie Medical Slang later for you) Radio system “We have 9 different towers that will transmit information and voice to you in your mobile (That is an ambulance radio) and it is a voting system, and I am a electronics techy who has no people skills, and want to tell you things you don’t need to know, and blah, and blah, and blah....” No wonder he mended radios.
After radios more MIMS. Still no proper break. Lunch was a rushed affair – and I had some admin to take care of with HR, so I managed a drink (coffee finally hurray) and a packet of crisps. (Maybe I’ll get something more substantial on the way home.) Lunch was followed by more (ARRGGGHHHH) MIMS. Quick break (called back to the HR office to clear up some clerical misunderstanding) which was only 5 minutes again. Then we had a MIMS exercise and discussion. Then the end. “Excellent” I thought – POETS Day, and we are done. (P**s Off Early Tomorrow is Saturday), but oh no, another session of something completely different. It was the longest day we’ve had (I suppose I can’t complain, as we still only worked from 0830 until 1600).
I am going to have to invest in an alarm clock. I didn’t manage to wake up until 7, and that was only when Jane rang me to say Good Morning/Goodnight. Oh well, we live and learn.
No time for any coffee on the way to work. We’ll be getting loads anyway through the day (So I thought). Bleary eyed I walked in, by the skin of my teeth. I hope that they don’t think that I’m going to make a habit of this.
The first session was filling in various forms needed for work. The session was taken straight from the course for the very new intake’s, who have never filled in Ambulance paperwork before. In my half asleep state I remember being pointed out the box for ‘Date’ and the Power Point Presentation instruction us to write in the box “Today’s Date”... and so it progressed. As you imagine, no breakfast, nothing to drink, I was very happily taking this in my stride (I don’t think).
Anyway – “Have a stretch – but don’t be long” Oh now... The only day I was hoping for it there wasn’t a coffee break 45 minutes into the first session. Anyway – we pressed on with more presentations. Major Incident Management Systems (MIMS) is an important subject I am sure (actually I do understand the reasons behind the instruction, being in a couple Major Incidents in Sussex), but it is about as interesting as a barrel of smashed crabs, with the best bits taken out. (New Aussie saying I’ve picked up). Boy did it drag.
Interspersed in the day was also a session on radios (not the music ones), and the set up of the Ambo (more Aussie Slang – ambulance – maybe I’ll include some of the Aussie Medical Slang later for you) Radio system “We have 9 different towers that will transmit information and voice to you in your mobile (That is an ambulance radio) and it is a voting system, and I am a electronics techy who has no people skills, and want to tell you things you don’t need to know, and blah, and blah, and blah....” No wonder he mended radios.
After radios more MIMS. Still no proper break. Lunch was a rushed affair – and I had some admin to take care of with HR, so I managed a drink (coffee finally hurray) and a packet of crisps. (Maybe I’ll get something more substantial on the way home.) Lunch was followed by more (ARRGGGHHHH) MIMS. Quick break (called back to the HR office to clear up some clerical misunderstanding) which was only 5 minutes again. Then we had a MIMS exercise and discussion. Then the end. “Excellent” I thought – POETS Day, and we are done. (P**s Off Early Tomorrow is Saturday), but oh no, another session of something completely different. It was the longest day we’ve had (I suppose I can’t complain, as we still only worked from 0830 until 1600).
Thurday - What a nice Day
Thursday
What a lovely day. It’s amazing how quick I’ve become accustomed to the weather out here. After a week of warm to very hot weather, I didn’t even need the Air Conditioning on driving to work this morning. It was about 23 with a high of 27. It was noticeably cooler, and I couldn’t stay at the beach very long in the afternoon.
Work was practical a holiday camp today. I’m sure that soon it will get harder.
When I got home, there was a pleasant surprise. My bank card for the bank here had arrived, and the final bit of visa paperwork had also arrived. I’d only just sent off for it. Everything is now in place.
I’ll have an early night tonight!!!
Wednesday - Another Short One
Wednesday
Morning routine – Wake Up, Iron Shirt, Shower, Rush Hour, Muzz Buzz (No Insults today) We were introduced to some the equipment we will be using on the Ambulances today. We were introduced to the equipment by Noah, and he said that this stuff had come off the ark with him, and it did look like it. We had mostly practical exercises all day, and it was good to see that I haven’t forgotten much of the practical skills I claimed I once knew. With all the physical activity, we had to have a whole pile of breaks both before and after lunch. It seemed we were going to go on a little (A little like this letter), but we still managed to finish at 3. I was going to take my new car out this afternoon, but I couldn’t get it started. I bumped it down the hill, but then when I stopped, I couldn’t start it again. Boy was I mad, I was going to get out, and smash it up. I tried everything I could think off. After I ran out of ideas, I looked in the manual. If I put my foot on the clutch, it started. What a dope I am.
Morning routine – Wake Up, Iron Shirt, Shower, Rush Hour, Muzz Buzz (No Insults today) We were introduced to some the equipment we will be using on the Ambulances today. We were introduced to the equipment by Noah, and he said that this stuff had come off the ark with him, and it did look like it. We had mostly practical exercises all day, and it was good to see that I haven’t forgotten much of the practical skills I claimed I once knew. With all the physical activity, we had to have a whole pile of breaks both before and after lunch. It seemed we were going to go on a little (A little like this letter), but we still managed to finish at 3. I was going to take my new car out this afternoon, but I couldn’t get it started. I bumped it down the hill, but then when I stopped, I couldn’t start it again. Boy was I mad, I was going to get out, and smash it up. I tried everything I could think off. After I ran out of ideas, I looked in the manual. If I put my foot on the clutch, it started. What a dope I am.
Tuesday - Coffee and Exersice
Tuesday
What a fabulous place to be. I woke up with the sun streaming in through the window when my alarm went off although actually it is Timmy Mallet singing Wackaday from my mobile phone, because I haven’t got an alarm clock yet. The early morning start with showers, and more ironing – yes two days in a row – is starting to get old already.
Into MuzzBuzz for more coffee. I thought the girl was being rude to me in the shop. I thought she said “You’re a Pom!”, which is derogatory Aussie slag for a British person. The other server also thought she said that, and laughed about not being able to call me that. When she explained herself, it was “Have a good One!” If you say it with a drawl, it could sound similar, so I’ll let her off. If that is the only time something like that happens, I’ll be alright.
I can hear you say, “What did he learn at work?” Let me tell you. I learned that instead of having to know and be able to use about 30 different medications, and drugs, I have to know 16, and even then, I can refer to charts for them. How great is that!! I think I’ll learn them this weekend, because mostly they are the same as what I was used to.
Coffee again
We had more Manual Handling training, but this was more interesting than ever was in Sussex, because it was actually a physiotherapist who came to talk to us. All of the physios that I have ever met, including Esther obviously, know their onions, when it comes to injury prevention, and this young lady was no different. We had about 2 hours talk about lifting and kinetics, and physics of carrying. What a difference from the last job, where it was fellow paramedics talking to you about a subject they don’t really understand. It actually was interesting. (Interspersed with 2-3 coffee breaks during the session, before lunch – I don’t think that I’ll be able to drink coffee during every break soon.)
After a light lunch of sandwiches again, it was more manual handling – but this not lifting and carrying, it was about 1 ½ hours of stretching exercises just to make us all feel relaxed. Then an introduction to the various sporting activities around about Perth, before finishing at about 3 p.m. (and yes we did have a coffee break during the very short afternoon session.
I went to the beach – I had been inspired to do some sort of activity, but that turned out to be reading, after a short swim in the ocean. I think I’ll have to lose a lot of weight before I venture to far out to sea. The Japanese are hunting whales round here, and I wouldn’t want them to mistake me for a Minkey. (I thought I’d say it before you).
Out to dinner at a Jamie and Julie’s house. It was nice to meet a couple who have made a go of it, since they moved to Perth last April. Good to catch up on old times.
What a fabulous place to be. I woke up with the sun streaming in through the window when my alarm went off although actually it is Timmy Mallet singing Wackaday from my mobile phone, because I haven’t got an alarm clock yet. The early morning start with showers, and more ironing – yes two days in a row – is starting to get old already.
Into MuzzBuzz for more coffee. I thought the girl was being rude to me in the shop. I thought she said “You’re a Pom!”, which is derogatory Aussie slag for a British person. The other server also thought she said that, and laughed about not being able to call me that. When she explained herself, it was “Have a good One!” If you say it with a drawl, it could sound similar, so I’ll let her off. If that is the only time something like that happens, I’ll be alright.
I can hear you say, “What did he learn at work?” Let me tell you. I learned that instead of having to know and be able to use about 30 different medications, and drugs, I have to know 16, and even then, I can refer to charts for them. How great is that!! I think I’ll learn them this weekend, because mostly they are the same as what I was used to.
Coffee again
We had more Manual Handling training, but this was more interesting than ever was in Sussex, because it was actually a physiotherapist who came to talk to us. All of the physios that I have ever met, including Esther obviously, know their onions, when it comes to injury prevention, and this young lady was no different. We had about 2 hours talk about lifting and kinetics, and physics of carrying. What a difference from the last job, where it was fellow paramedics talking to you about a subject they don’t really understand. It actually was interesting. (Interspersed with 2-3 coffee breaks during the session, before lunch – I don’t think that I’ll be able to drink coffee during every break soon.)
After a light lunch of sandwiches again, it was more manual handling – but this not lifting and carrying, it was about 1 ½ hours of stretching exercises just to make us all feel relaxed. Then an introduction to the various sporting activities around about Perth, before finishing at about 3 p.m. (and yes we did have a coffee break during the very short afternoon session.
I went to the beach – I had been inspired to do some sort of activity, but that turned out to be reading, after a short swim in the ocean. I think I’ll have to lose a lot of weight before I venture to far out to sea. The Japanese are hunting whales round here, and I wouldn’t want them to mistake me for a Minkey. (I thought I’d say it before you).
Out to dinner at a Jamie and Julie’s house. It was nice to meet a couple who have made a go of it, since they moved to Perth last April. Good to catch up on old times.
Day One of Work
MondayIt was a little bit of a shock to wake up and actually go to work. I’ve not actually been into work for about a month, and the last time I actually was at work, I was kneeling on a dirty road, in the pouring rain, and the freezing cold night looking after someone who had been run over. What a change? The sun was shining, and there wasn’t a cloud in the sky.
I wasn’t that prepared for work, and had shirts to iron. (That is a shock, as the Sussex Ambulance Shirts didn’t get ironed very often.) The ambulance HQ has a drive thru coffee shop – Muzz Buzz – next door to the training school (great innovation – large cappuccino for one please—ambulance discount, what a bonusJ) I was a little nervous meeting everyone, but we all seemed to be in the same situation. I say we all were in the same situation but we weren’t. There are 4 paramedics from Trafford Ambulance Station (near Manchester – in anyone still left there), and a South African couple are actually a couple.
The day was what you might expect at a new job, with introductions, and a couple guidelines, before coffee. And then the boredom set in. The first people in to speak to us were the people for the Human Resources Department. The first session was on equal opportunity/employment legislation/bullying and harassment policies. I know that it is important, but my goodness, it is a little gruelling.
Coffee again. (This is great, it’s only 11, and we’ve actually had 2 x 20 minute breaks) I don’t think I’ll get burnout too quickly.
After coffee – more legislation. This time Health and Safety, and Manual Handling, and Risk Management. I don’t think that lunch couldn’t come quick enough.
After a light lunch of a roast beef sandwich (only one round of bread) and another hour break – It was more from HR. This time it was administration. Visa validation, driving licence checks (I hadn’t got mine yet, although it was good to know that the service will reimburse me for the licence – I’ll get the longest one possible, 5 years for £70), pension fund checks, bank details, ID pass photos, Tax Declarations. There are a lot of differences from the UK – I don’t understand what salary sacrifice is, but it will make me money so I’m all for it. (And a couple breaks)We were all sent home about 14:30. Not bad for a first day. I think tomorrow will be a lot longer.
I managed to get my driver’s licence, without a test. They recognise that the UK drivers licence, and will transfer it into Australian Licence straight away. The South Africans on the course are having to take driving lessons, and a driving test. (There are 5 of them). I would hate that.
I wonder what the rest of the week will bring. I pondered that thought for a while in the pub down the road for a while.
The first day of Rest
Sunday
Woke up this morning to Blue Sky, and a very pleasant ambient temperature. I went along to a local church this morning, and had a very pleasant time. It was a Baptist Church, and was very busy. Afterwards, I was chatting away to the pastor, and upon hearing that I had only just arrived in the last couple of days, he invited me to have lunch with him and his family. It was very pleasant, and a social occasion. It was great to get to know other people as well.
While we were discussing my situation, I was explaining about the living situation, and he mentioned that there was a lady he knew with a room to rent. After a couple of phone calls, I’ve been to look at the house, and it is great, so I’ll be moving in there sometime next week. That is everything done and dusted now, ready for work tomorrow.
I imagine that next week will be a couple of lines of “I was at a training course, and then went home”, so don’t be to dismayed by this first epistle.
Woke up this morning to Blue Sky, and a very pleasant ambient temperature. I went along to a local church this morning, and had a very pleasant time. It was a Baptist Church, and was very busy. Afterwards, I was chatting away to the pastor, and upon hearing that I had only just arrived in the last couple of days, he invited me to have lunch with him and his family. It was very pleasant, and a social occasion. It was great to get to know other people as well.
While we were discussing my situation, I was explaining about the living situation, and he mentioned that there was a lady he knew with a room to rent. After a couple of phone calls, I’ve been to look at the house, and it is great, so I’ll be moving in there sometime next week. That is everything done and dusted now, ready for work tomorrow.
I imagine that next week will be a couple of lines of “I was at a training course, and then went home”, so don’t be to dismayed by this first epistle.
Day Three - A close shave
Saturday
I have finally purchased a car, and am going to the bank every day for the next 4 days to withdraw $500 a day (ATM Limit) to pay for it. It was $2300, and it is not me at all.
It is a Mauve Hyundai Excel, which is a little like an old Ford Escort. It is two doors, and a lift up boot lid (so I guess that you could call it a 3 door sedan)
It’s got dents and scratches everywhere, and not much inside is going for it either except it does have air-con, and it is cheap to run. It’s stereo doesn’t work very well. I’ll have to have a little tinker with it and I’ll be able to claim lots of petrol/mileage to pay for it.
If it breaks down, oh well, I’ll have to rethink my plan.
So that was the about the best bit of the day. I did go to a shopping mall (could of been the Florida Mall by the size and type of shops in it). I had a look around Target, and K-Mart, before wandering about inside, looking at places like Foot-Locker, The Body Shop, and a River Island (their cloths still don’t fit me here). I popped into the food court and had a large bowl of Mie Goreng (just like in Indonesia). I think the server was amazed, as I asked for it in Indonesian as well.
After that, I popped back home to look at the internet, to try and find some more properties to live in.
I found a place where there was a room to rent, with a BBQ, and a pool, and Broadband. I thought that was excellent, so I arranged a time to visit it. It was near the main bit of the city.
I drove down there, and met the man who was renting one of the rooms in his apartment. He seemed a little funny, and was a little camp. (I thought “Give him a chance, I need somewhere to live”. While he was showing me around the house, he was pointing out things such as “There is an iPod”, and “There is the Fridge”. Oh dear, I was thinking. He showed me the room, which was alright.
I can hear you thinking, what is the problem??? The next room he showed me was the store cupboard with some power tools in it. “You can make some cupboards, if you want”. And then the bathroom. He pulled out some sort of spray bleach type bathroom cleaner, and then said that he expected everyone to use the spray on the bathroom wall, during their shower. I could still put up with that for a while.
Then while chatting I asked if he was working – (I had already found out that he was a photographer – he takes arty shots of food such as asparagus, and an orange segment.) His reply was that he wasn’t working, as he was on medical disability benefit. Alarm bells started ringing, as at that point, while he was making me a coffee, I spotted a couple medication bottles in the cupboard. I recognised the name of the one of the drugs, and had to know more.
When I asked why he was on medical benefit, he told me that he had some major psychiatric problems (under control at the moment), because he smoked to much drugs when he was younger.
I have decided that it isn’t the place for me. He might be alright, but I am not going to risk it.
Anyway, that is how my day has gone. Very poorly, but I did laugh.
Supper was fish and chips, but not Cod. It was Red Snapper, and that was very nice.
I have finally purchased a car, and am going to the bank every day for the next 4 days to withdraw $500 a day (ATM Limit) to pay for it. It was $2300, and it is not me at all.
It is a Mauve Hyundai Excel, which is a little like an old Ford Escort. It is two doors, and a lift up boot lid (so I guess that you could call it a 3 door sedan)
It’s got dents and scratches everywhere, and not much inside is going for it either except it does have air-con, and it is cheap to run. It’s stereo doesn’t work very well. I’ll have to have a little tinker with it and I’ll be able to claim lots of petrol/mileage to pay for it.
If it breaks down, oh well, I’ll have to rethink my plan.
So that was the about the best bit of the day. I did go to a shopping mall (could of been the Florida Mall by the size and type of shops in it). I had a look around Target, and K-Mart, before wandering about inside, looking at places like Foot-Locker, The Body Shop, and a River Island (their cloths still don’t fit me here). I popped into the food court and had a large bowl of Mie Goreng (just like in Indonesia). I think the server was amazed, as I asked for it in Indonesian as well.
After that, I popped back home to look at the internet, to try and find some more properties to live in.
I found a place where there was a room to rent, with a BBQ, and a pool, and Broadband. I thought that was excellent, so I arranged a time to visit it. It was near the main bit of the city.
I drove down there, and met the man who was renting one of the rooms in his apartment. He seemed a little funny, and was a little camp. (I thought “Give him a chance, I need somewhere to live”. While he was showing me around the house, he was pointing out things such as “There is an iPod”, and “There is the Fridge”. Oh dear, I was thinking. He showed me the room, which was alright.
I can hear you thinking, what is the problem??? The next room he showed me was the store cupboard with some power tools in it. “You can make some cupboards, if you want”. And then the bathroom. He pulled out some sort of spray bleach type bathroom cleaner, and then said that he expected everyone to use the spray on the bathroom wall, during their shower. I could still put up with that for a while.
Then while chatting I asked if he was working – (I had already found out that he was a photographer – he takes arty shots of food such as asparagus, and an orange segment.) His reply was that he wasn’t working, as he was on medical disability benefit. Alarm bells started ringing, as at that point, while he was making me a coffee, I spotted a couple medication bottles in the cupboard. I recognised the name of the one of the drugs, and had to know more.
When I asked why he was on medical benefit, he told me that he had some major psychiatric problems (under control at the moment), because he smoked to much drugs when he was younger.
I have decided that it isn’t the place for me. He might be alright, but I am not going to risk it.
Anyway, that is how my day has gone. Very poorly, but I did laugh.
Supper was fish and chips, but not Cod. It was Red Snapper, and that was very nice.
Day Two
Friday
First thing this morning, there was a little get together at Ambulance HQ for all of those people who are starting work with me on Monday. It was good to hear that three other paramedics who are starting are in the same situation, with leaving their families in England, because of the short notice. I couldn’t stay for long, as I had lined up looking at three or four rooms for rent that afternoon, and I did want to buy a car as well.
I went around the car yards, and found a small economical car, but decided to sleep on buying it, as I was really pushed for time, looking at houses.
The rooms I looked at ranged from (the best) – a cinderblock extension to a bedsit, to a garden shed, with the shower in the kitchen. I was very unimpressed, as there weren’t many rooms available, and they were all rubbish. Still, I had a couple more on Saturday to look at. Fingers crossed.
I thought I would chance my arm at opening a bank account, (No Proof of Address could be the stumbling block). The lady in the bank was very understanding, and they were willing to waive the proof of address for English people who had moved over with 6 weeks of opening the account. That took a weight off my mind, as now I had some official document with my address on it. I rushed up to the Driving licence place, but they were closed.
It was a hard day family wise, as I was missing Daisy, Jane and Analiese. It was great to call them on the video phone (SKYPE) and I felt better.
First thing this morning, there was a little get together at Ambulance HQ for all of those people who are starting work with me on Monday. It was good to hear that three other paramedics who are starting are in the same situation, with leaving their families in England, because of the short notice. I couldn’t stay for long, as I had lined up looking at three or four rooms for rent that afternoon, and I did want to buy a car as well.
I went around the car yards, and found a small economical car, but decided to sleep on buying it, as I was really pushed for time, looking at houses.
The rooms I looked at ranged from (the best) – a cinderblock extension to a bedsit, to a garden shed, with the shower in the kitchen. I was very unimpressed, as there weren’t many rooms available, and they were all rubbish. Still, I had a couple more on Saturday to look at. Fingers crossed.
I thought I would chance my arm at opening a bank account, (No Proof of Address could be the stumbling block). The lady in the bank was very understanding, and they were willing to waive the proof of address for English people who had moved over with 6 weeks of opening the account. That took a weight off my mind, as now I had some official document with my address on it. I rushed up to the Driving licence place, but they were closed.
It was a hard day family wise, as I was missing Daisy, Jane and Analiese. It was great to call them on the video phone (SKYPE) and I felt better.
My First Day
Thursday
When I woke up (early, as the temperature was rising, and the Air Condition is broken), the list of things that I needed to do seemed a little daunting. Not only did I not know hardly anyone, but I didn’t know where anything was either. What to do first.
It seemed logical to pick up my hire car, as that way I won’t have to rely on my host’s (Alan and Emma, with 3 kids) generosity, and running me everywhere. Alan drove me back to the airport (40 minutes) were I picked up the car I had booked. That was the first slice of good luck. The car company didn’t have the car I had booked (a very basic, cheap model) and gave me a free upgrade to a little bigger car. I have a bright red Toyota Corolla for the next week.
It seemed logical that I should get some official stuff done, so I drove into downtown Perth, and very fortunately found the Immigration office at the attempt. I’ve had my visa validated in my passport in about 30 minutes, so not bad.
Walking back to my car, I saw a hardware shop that was advertising cheap upright fans, so I couldn’t pass up that chance. I wasn’t going to spend another night like last night.
After sampling a couple of the local cafes for coffee, and sushi??(I know you wouldn’t believe it) I had my next appointment. It was for a uniform fitting. I had heard horror stories from people about the uniform stores being able to only supply one sock, or a shirt that was 8 sizes to big (I would like to see them offer me a shirt that was 8 sizes to big—I hear you say that there isn’t enough cotton in the world), but mine was all in stock, including a very fetching cowboy hat, (I don’t think I’ll be wearing that. Jane almost fell off her chair when I showed it to her).
On the way back to where I live, I tried another of the local traditions, a drive thru off licence (I was very rubbish at it, as I didn’t know any beers, or wine they could offer, so I had to get out the car. I might as well have walked into the shop like any normal person.
I drove round to the Drivers Licensing place, to get a Australian Licence, which I need for work, but am stuck in a little Catch 22 at the moment. I can’t get a licence until I can show proof of address, and I can’t get a proof of Address, until I get a driver’s licence, or bank account, or the like.
I fell into bed that night. Boy was I tired.
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